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Why Golden Retriever energy wins hearts without even trying

Writer: Neil Gregori GarenNeil Gregori Garen

Why Golden Retriever energy wins hearts without even trying

Ever met someone who walks into a room, and instantly, people want to be around them? No effort, no gimmicks. Just pure, natural charisma that draws people in. Now, have you also met someone who thinks they have that energy but, in reality, makes people mentally draft an escape plan or stay only out of pity and social obligation?


That’s the thing about Golden Retriever Energy (GRE), it’s not something to be claimed but something that naturally radiates. It’s an effortless aura of warmth, playfulness, and charm. Golden Retrievers don’t try to be loved; they simply exist, wag their tails, and suddenly, everyone’s smiling. On the other hand, there are those who try far too hard. A gentle reminder, if it doesn’t come naturally, it’s not GRE. Forcing the label isn’t confidence, it’s just desperate self-importance.


Golden Retriever energy attracts

Golden Retrievers run up to strangers, and the immediate reaction is to pet them, not escape. On the other hand, Chihuahuas also rush toward people, but half the time, the response is to take a defensive step back. High-energy friendliness is only endearing when it’s genuinely likable, not overwhelming. If people are inching away rather than leaning in, that’s not GRE. That’s just being too much. And if the energy being given off is more “Chihuahua on an espresso shot” than “Golden Retriever charm,” it might be time for some self-reflection.


Naturally adorable, not just Noticeable

A Golden Retriever can flop onto the floor and still be adorable. The same can’t be said for everyone. If people only find someone tolerable when they’re quiet, then let’s be honest—there’s no GRE there. What’s more likely is “Husky throwing a tantrum” Energy, which is a whole different experience. Natural charisma doesn’t require constant noise or exaggerated antics. It’s either there, or it’s not.


And here’s another thing. When a Golden Retriever isn’t around, chances are, they’re missed. Their absence is felt because their presence was genuinely enjoyable. If no one ever checks in or wonders where someone went, it’s not because of some mysterious “too cool to care” aura. It’s because their presence was never that compelling to begin with. Maybe there’s some concern, or worse, pity, but that’s an entirely different thing, and it’s definitely not charm.


Playfulness that’s endearing

Golden Retrievers are playful, but in a way that invites people in. There’s a big difference between being fun and being a lot to handle. The kind of energy that makes interactions enjoyable is lighthearted, not a performance that drains everyone in the room. If people are sticking around, but only because of shared commitments like an organization, a club, or a community activity, then maybe the connection isn’t as strong as imagined. At that point, it’s not about charm, it’s just circumstance. And if the only thing keeping people from walking away is social obligation or, worse, pity, then let’s be real, that’s not a compliment.


Other Dogs Are Cute Too

Yes, Corgis have meme-worthy butts, Shiba Inus are effortlessly photogenic, and Pomeranians get away with having a permanent attitude. Siberian Huskies, with their expressive faces and dramatic personalities, bring endless entertainment. Each breed has its own charm that makes people love them. But when people talk about GRE, they’re referring to a very specific kind of charisma, one that is universally adored. Not every dog is a Golden Retriever, and that’s okay. Having a different kind of energy doesn’t make someone any less special.


Being called a Golden Retriever isn’t a self-declaration

Golden Retrievers don’t go around announcing how lovable they are. People naturally say it about them. The same applies to GRE. If no one has ever called someone a Golden Retriever, then perhaps it is because they simply are not one. Declaring oneself as a beacon of charm and charisma, without actual proof, is not confidence—it is narcissism with a touch of self-delusion, possibly even manipulation. No one appreciates a forced narrative. If the energy is truly there, people will recognize it without being told.


Golden Retriever Energy isn’t about trying to be lovable. It’s being lovable without effort. Some have it. Some don’t. And that’s fine. The only real issue is forcing a label that doesn’t fit—because at that point, it’s no longer charisma, just wishful thinking.


“People may hear your words, but they feel your attitude.” - John Maxwell

Keep learning with me and stay updated on my regular Smart Garen Tips by following my Facebook page: Neil Gregori Garen.

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